Rest

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. Psalm 23v1-2

Over the past few years, God has completely changed my understanding of this scripture. I had always seen these verses as being an invitation from God - an opportunity to come before him and lie down in green pastures and walk beside him along quiet waters to refresh my soul.

I have always been very busy serving others and went through a long time when I was just really busy all the time - I was doing really good things but just far too much! I gradually got more and more tired and it became normal for me to be tired all the time. I didn't really think too much of it until it got the point where I was exhausted all the time and physically struggling to walk for more than a few minutes without being completely out of breath. I saw the doctor and after lots of tests and more deterioration, she eventually diagnosed me as having chronic fatigue. I had to completely stop doing everything and my doctors instructions were to work in the mornings, go home for lunch and sleep for an hour or so in the afternoon and then get up and go for a walk before going back home, having tea and going back to sleep again!

Looking back, I could have simply followed God's instructions in Psalm 23 as that's what the doctor told me to do! Those months of constant fatigue have taught me a lot! I now understand that rest is not an optional choice, it shouldn't be a luxury to squeeze in a bit of rest when we have time. It's something God makes us do for our own good! He makes me lie down and take time out to rest and he leads me in what I should and should not be doing.

I've had to completely change my lifestyle and now, as soon as I start feeling tired and drained I stop and deliberately take time out to rest. I've learned the hard way that rest is essential and if I don't choose to do it myself, God will make me rest!